Hard Day

Yesterday while your parents were out, I stayed home to clean the house, I put on my smooth jazz music, which your dad calls elevator , General Hospital music! I listen to that station every day at work so I put it on to work yesterday.  I was dusting the molding around your bedroom door which has been kept closed since we came home from the hospital, when I had an urge to go in. I had only seen some pictures of your room that your mom had sent to me. The room is beautiful! It has trees on the wall and a beautiful drawing that your parents friend did. And your changing table is a real live tree! Your mom has always had unique ideas and tastes, which makes her extra special. I did ok in your room untilI looked at your little dresses. It hurt to know that you would never be wearing them. I wanted to quickly pack them away so your mom wouldn't feel that same pain but I would never do that as it is your mom and dads decision. It frightens me to think about your mom going in your room and at times she says she just wants your room to be gone but I told your mom and dad that they need to talk more about that. I called a mommy that lost a baby like you and I told her about my fears for your mom and she told me what she did and her thoughts. It was really helpful. I will pass it along to your mom when I think she is ready.
Love you Hazel Rose, Grams